"The Mustachioed One"
Showing posts with label potato. Show all posts
Showing posts with label potato. Show all posts
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Pareidolia Project Day 28
"Roast Beef Ninja"
January 23, 2011
Ingredients:
Roast beef sandwich
Potato salad from leftover potatoes previous night. Add pickle, mustard and mayonnaise.
"One does not see the sandwich assassins unless the sandwich assassins want to be seen, and by then, it is too late." Proverb of the lunch ronin.
Of course my mom didn't see this. IT'S A FREAKIN' NINJA!
Roast beef sandwich
Potato salad from leftover potatoes previous night. Add pickle, mustard and mayonnaise.
"One does not see the sandwich assassins unless the sandwich assassins want to be seen, and by then, it is too late." Proverb of the lunch ronin.
Of course my mom didn't see this. IT'S A FREAKIN' NINJA!
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Pareidolia Project Day 27, Part II.
"I'm a FISH!"
January 22, 2011
Ingredients:
Roast beef and potaotes
Steamed frozen veggie mix
This dish is roast beef and potatoes, masquerading as something healthier. Something that has the freedom of the entire sea at its disposal. Alas, this was not to be. It was a disguise that could not be maintained. It is a fish no longer.
My mom's response: "Oh, are we out of horseradish?"
Roast beef and potaotes
Steamed frozen veggie mix
This dish is roast beef and potatoes, masquerading as something healthier. Something that has the freedom of the entire sea at its disposal. Alas, this was not to be. It was a disguise that could not be maintained. It is a fish no longer.
My mom's response: "Oh, are we out of horseradish?"
Friday, January 21, 2011
Pareidolia Project Day 26, Part II.
"Black Bean Beard"
January 21, 2011
Ingredients:
Meat loaf. I'm not even going to list a recipe here because I only had about a pound and a half of hamburger and just kind of threw things together to make it "southwestern-style".
Baked potato with sour cream and cheese
Black beans
I took a more subtle approach in this one. The eyes are black beans, and the head is meat loaf with bacon on top. I didn't want to use bacon for evil eyebrows twice in one day, so it just forms the top of the head.
Meat loaf. I'm not even going to list a recipe here because I only had about a pound and a half of hamburger and just kind of threw things together to make it "southwestern-style".
Baked potato with sour cream and cheese
Black beans
I took a more subtle approach in this one. The eyes are black beans, and the head is meat loaf with bacon on top. I didn't want to use bacon for evil eyebrows twice in one day, so it just forms the top of the head.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Pareidolia Project Day 22
"German Food Vampire"
January 17, 2011
Ingredients:
Sauerkraut carmelized in butter and onion
German potato salad (potato, bacon, whole grain mustard, onion, vinegar, salt/pepper and sugar)
Beets
Smoked turkey sausage. Yes, I know Jenny-O isn't real German sausage, but it was on sale.
Sour cream
Pimento from green olive (eyes)
I kind of feel like this is what Goofy would look like if he were to suddenly turn into a vampire. I could just see it now. Mickey and Minnie are walking down the boardwalk in Disneyland's Imaginationland on a nice romantic night. Suddenly, Goofy walks up. Mickey extends his hand for a greeting, and Goody, with the speed of the wind, breaks his neck and begins to feed. Minnie screams in abject horror and is paralyzed momentarily with fear. As Goofy seems distracted, she scrambles for an exit, but Goofy stops her.
"Gorsh! I wanna suck your blood, Minnie! Join us! Hyuk!" He says as he gazes into her eyes. It's too late for her now. She has become one of them.
One of my friends saw a similarity between this and goatse. If you aren't familiar with goatse, do yourself a favor and don't become familiar with it. Ever. Just, don't even ask about it, don't google it and put it out of your mind forever.
Now that you have ignored my instructions, that image is permanently scarred in your brain. You will begin to see it in everything, but I didn't have any intent to sculpt it into my mother's food. However, I did let my friend who suggest it know that I would be happy to cook for her and her husband sometime.
Mom saw another face in this.
Sauerkraut carmelized in butter and onion
German potato salad (potato, bacon, whole grain mustard, onion, vinegar, salt/pepper and sugar)
Beets
Smoked turkey sausage. Yes, I know Jenny-O isn't real German sausage, but it was on sale.
Sour cream
Pimento from green olive (eyes)
I kind of feel like this is what Goofy would look like if he were to suddenly turn into a vampire. I could just see it now. Mickey and Minnie are walking down the boardwalk in Disneyland's Imaginationland on a nice romantic night. Suddenly, Goofy walks up. Mickey extends his hand for a greeting, and Goody, with the speed of the wind, breaks his neck and begins to feed. Minnie screams in abject horror and is paralyzed momentarily with fear. As Goofy seems distracted, she scrambles for an exit, but Goofy stops her.
"Gorsh! I wanna suck your blood, Minnie! Join us! Hyuk!" He says as he gazes into her eyes. It's too late for her now. She has become one of them.
One of my friends saw a similarity between this and goatse. If you aren't familiar with goatse, do yourself a favor and don't become familiar with it. Ever. Just, don't even ask about it, don't google it and put it out of your mind forever.
Now that you have ignored my instructions, that image is permanently scarred in your brain. You will begin to see it in everything, but I didn't have any intent to sculpt it into my mother's food. However, I did let my friend who suggest it know that I would be happy to cook for her and her husband sometime.
Mom saw another face in this.
Pareidolia Project Day 21
"Salad Hiding in the Land of Sandwiches"
January 16, 2011
January 16, 2011
Ingredients:
Grilled cheese with turkey and tomato
Mixed Greens
Pickle
Jalapeno and chopped black olive (eyes)
Cottage cheese with salsa
This was a fairly light lunch of a small salad and half a sandwich. Mom didn't notice this, which is exactly what the salad was hoping for. Dinner, however was a far more serious matter.
Grilled cheese with turkey and tomato
Mixed Greens
Pickle
Jalapeno and chopped black olive (eyes)
Cottage cheese with salsa
This was a fairly light lunch of a small salad and half a sandwich. Mom didn't notice this, which is exactly what the salad was hoping for. Dinner, however was a far more serious matter.
"Angry Potato Odin and his Green Bean Beard"
January 16, 2011
January 16, 2011
Ingredients:
Potatoes. Thin sliced and baked in layers with cream, jalapeno, butter and seasonings. Not quite scalloped, but not quite not, either.
Sour cream
Pearl onions and chopped black olive
French cut green beans with onion and Tabasco.
I do cook vegetarian food on occasion. This is especially true in times when I need to save money, because most veggies are really cheap. I think a ten-pound bag of potatoes is a particularly good investment for cooking on a budget. Potatoes are very versatile, nutritious, and tasty. They also make for a good head of hair on the mighty Odin. Mom noticed Odin, but could not gauge his expression, referring to him once again as a face.
Potatoes. Thin sliced and baked in layers with cream, jalapeno, butter and seasonings. Not quite scalloped, but not quite not, either.
Sour cream
Pearl onions and chopped black olive
French cut green beans with onion and Tabasco.
I do cook vegetarian food on occasion. This is especially true in times when I need to save money, because most veggies are really cheap. I think a ten-pound bag of potatoes is a particularly good investment for cooking on a budget. Potatoes are very versatile, nutritious, and tasty. They also make for a good head of hair on the mighty Odin. Mom noticed Odin, but could not gauge his expression, referring to him once again as a face.
Pareidolia Project Day 17
"Furby Baked Potato, Tilapia, and Beets"
January 11, 2011
Ingredients:
Pan-baked tilapia seasoned with Old Bay, brown butter, onion and lemon pepper
Canned beets
Baked potato
Sour cream
Key lime
Chopped black olive
Shredded Mexican blend cheese
Homemade salsa
I just want to say that out of all the possible ways to cook a potato, I loathe, repeat, LOATHE baked. They take forever, and they have no flavor or personality, especially compared to something like mashed potatoes or scalloped potatoes or fries or au gratin or dauphinoise, or hell, even steamed new potatoes in butter. I can name about 50 ways to cook a potato, and in order from best to worst, baked is somewhere on the bottom. Probably right above tournets, though. When a person orders a baked potato and other options are available, it tells me that they are a product of a bygone era that cooked potatoes with no imagination. Needless to say, I don't make them all that often, even though my mom loves baked potatoes.
Well, on Day 17, I had to begin rehearsal for a sketch show I participate in, so I wouldn't be home to cook that night. We probably had fast food for lunch, and I couldn't leave mom hungry or my friends, who were providing great feedback on the project, in a lurch. I had enough time, so I put it all in the oven, and she got her baked potato. I have to say, I do make them a lot more appealing than I normally see.
Anyway, I precooked and plated this, but I had to refrigerate it since I wouldn't be home to serve. Just before I left, I went to the fridge to get some iced tea and noticed all the beets had been eaten. In the car on the way over, mom told me for the first time that she really enjoyed the faces.
To me, this had gone from venting passive-aggression, to a personality study, to an art project to something that boosted morale just a little bit every day. It's now a combination of all of the above. Times are tough, and it seemed like my life was slowly turning into Calvin and Hobbes, but instead of snowmen, I had my mom's lunch.
Pan-baked tilapia seasoned with Old Bay, brown butter, onion and lemon pepper
Canned beets
Baked potato
Sour cream
Key lime
Chopped black olive
Shredded Mexican blend cheese
Homemade salsa
I just want to say that out of all the possible ways to cook a potato, I loathe, repeat, LOATHE baked. They take forever, and they have no flavor or personality, especially compared to something like mashed potatoes or scalloped potatoes or fries or au gratin or dauphinoise, or hell, even steamed new potatoes in butter. I can name about 50 ways to cook a potato, and in order from best to worst, baked is somewhere on the bottom. Probably right above tournets, though. When a person orders a baked potato and other options are available, it tells me that they are a product of a bygone era that cooked potatoes with no imagination. Needless to say, I don't make them all that often, even though my mom loves baked potatoes.
Well, on Day 17, I had to begin rehearsal for a sketch show I participate in, so I wouldn't be home to cook that night. We probably had fast food for lunch, and I couldn't leave mom hungry or my friends, who were providing great feedback on the project, in a lurch. I had enough time, so I put it all in the oven, and she got her baked potato. I have to say, I do make them a lot more appealing than I normally see.
Anyway, I precooked and plated this, but I had to refrigerate it since I wouldn't be home to serve. Just before I left, I went to the fridge to get some iced tea and noticed all the beets had been eaten. In the car on the way over, mom told me for the first time that she really enjoyed the faces.
To me, this had gone from venting passive-aggression, to a personality study, to an art project to something that boosted morale just a little bit every day. It's now a combination of all of the above. Times are tough, and it seemed like my life was slowly turning into Calvin and Hobbes, but instead of snowmen, I had my mom's lunch.
Pareidolia Project Day 14
"Tamale Mummy"
January 8, 2011
Ingredients:
Tamales. Alas, I did not make these.*
Bell pepper strips
Homemade salsa
Jalapenos
*My brother and his long-time girlfriend made these as part of my mom's Christmas present. They freeze in the husks quite nicely.
Tamales. Alas, I did not make these.*
Bell pepper strips
Homemade salsa
Jalapenos
*My brother and his long-time girlfriend made these as part of my mom's Christmas present. They freeze in the husks quite nicely.
My mom didn't see the mummy this time. Sticking with the theme of thrillers, dinner that evening...
"Donnie Darko Chicken and Mashed Potatoes"
January 8, 2011
Trying my hand with a pop culture reference is always a long shot for my mom. She watches Law and Order, The Closer, CSI, Bones, that channel where there's always a murder re-enactment... She's not really big into psychological metaphysical thrillers.
She saw a face. I thought she would at least have seen a bunny or something, but not so.
She saw a face. I thought she would at least have seen a bunny or something, but not so.
Pareidolia Project Day 13
"Pickled Cthulhu Rising From Potato Salad R'lyeh"
January 7, 2011
Ingredients:
Potato
Ham
Onion
Whole grain mustard
Sour cream
Cthulhu:
Kosher dill pickle
Pepperoncini
Chopped black olive and pimento from green olive (eyes)
Mixed greens (wings and arms)
Here's the thing about Cthulhu: either you know about him or you don't. If you don't the unspeakable horror that is him is best left from your mind's eye. If you do, his presence is truly everywhere and it's only a matter of time before it drives you mad. My mom saw "something" here, but she couldn't describe what.
Later that evening, dinner brought another inspiration. Behold! His noodly appendage...
Potato
Ham
Onion
Whole grain mustard
Sour cream
Cthulhu:
Kosher dill pickle
Pepperoncini
Chopped black olive and pimento from green olive (eyes)
Mixed greens (wings and arms)
Here's the thing about Cthulhu: either you know about him or you don't. If you don't the unspeakable horror that is him is best left from your mind's eye. If you do, his presence is truly everywhere and it's only a matter of time before it drives you mad. My mom saw "something" here, but she couldn't describe what.
Later that evening, dinner brought another inspiration. Behold! His noodly appendage...
"Lounging Spaghetti Monster"
January 7, 2011
January 7, 2011
Ingredients:
Spaghetti
Spaghetti sauce
Pearl onions and chopped black olives (eyes)
Okay, so you know how Jesus is always appearing in a tortilla or a moldy orange or something stupid? Well, that's pareidolia. Alternately, when Pastafarians think they see the Flying Spaghetti Monster in a bowl of noodles, they actually ARE seeing it! Praise be unto his noodly appendage, ramen!
Mom did not notice this.
Spaghetti
Spaghetti sauce
Pearl onions and chopped black olives (eyes)
Okay, so you know how Jesus is always appearing in a tortilla or a moldy orange or something stupid? Well, that's pareidolia. Alternately, when Pastafarians think they see the Flying Spaghetti Monster in a bowl of noodles, they actually ARE seeing it! Praise be unto his noodly appendage, ramen!
Mom did not notice this.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Pareidolia Project Day 11
"Hooty, the Horned Harbinger of the Foodpocalypse"
January 5, 2011
January 5, 2011
Ingredients:
Eggs
Sausage
Toast
Green olive
Cholula sauce (the beak)
Again, she did not see this picture. She also didn't ask questions many people would ask, like "why is this one sausage cut in half?" or "why are there olives on the eggs?". I truly wasn't sure what to make of that. Fortunately, I had decided to expand the project from solely lunch to lunch and dinner, thus increasing my material.
"A Pretty Fish Lady With Green Eyes"
January 5, 2011
Eggs
Sausage
Toast
Green olive
Cholula sauce (the beak)
Again, she did not see this picture. She also didn't ask questions many people would ask, like "why is this one sausage cut in half?" or "why are there olives on the eggs?". I truly wasn't sure what to make of that. Fortunately, I had decided to expand the project from solely lunch to lunch and dinner, thus increasing my material.
"A Pretty Fish Lady With Green Eyes"January 5, 2011
Ingredients:
Pan-fried tilapia
Sweet peas with jalapeno
Mashed potatoes with cheese and ham
Pearl onion
Tomato and chopped black olive (lips and eyes)
She saw the face in this. In retrospect, a few friends who saw this pointed out that I could have made this Homer Simpson in drag or even a tyrannosaurus (the way the fish flaked when the filet was split). Oh well. It's essentially a disassembled fisherman's pie, except my grandparents always made fisherman's pie with tuna fish and no personality.
Pan-fried tilapia
Sweet peas with jalapeno
Mashed potatoes with cheese and ham
Pearl onion
Tomato and chopped black olive (lips and eyes)
She saw the face in this. In retrospect, a few friends who saw this pointed out that I could have made this Homer Simpson in drag or even a tyrannosaurus (the way the fish flaked when the filet was split). Oh well. It's essentially a disassembled fisherman's pie, except my grandparents always made fisherman's pie with tuna fish and no personality.
Pareidolia Project Day 5
"Frantic Soup"
December 30, 2010
Ingredients:
(Note: This is a home-made ham chowder and therefore a little advanced. If you aren't familiar with making soup, good luck)
Ham
Potato
Milk
Onion
Garlic
Rendered bacon
Chicken stock
Heavy cream
Sour cream (quinelles)
Cholula sauce
She asked me if there were marshmallows floating in the soup. She wasn't familiar with quinelles, so I just told her it was sour cream. It's basically what they are.
She didn't see the face, and by this time, I was dismayed. She had not recognized a single face I had put in her food. I decided I was going to give the project one more shot.
(Note: This is a home-made ham chowder and therefore a little advanced. If you aren't familiar with making soup, good luck)
Ham
Potato
Milk
Onion
Garlic
Rendered bacon
Chicken stock
Heavy cream
Sour cream (quinelles)
Cholula sauce
She asked me if there were marshmallows floating in the soup. She wasn't familiar with quinelles, so I just told her it was sour cream. It's basically what they are.
She didn't see the face, and by this time, I was dismayed. She had not recognized a single face I had put in her food. I decided I was going to give the project one more shot.
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